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 Review of Phantoms Revenge @ Kennywood
0 Rating Posted by: hrrytraver on 8/11/2005 8:58:00 PM
phantoms revenge made a big impression on me, no doubt. the first drop is very violent swooping curve, which, if planted in the rear car, will snap you over righteously quick so your right eye brow is pointed at the ground 160 feet below and then usher you down to that very ground in about a second and a half whereupon you will then find yourself screaming across a straight-away with your hair blowing all the way back and tears pouring outof your eyes. after the slow loud chain lift this first section really woke me up and gave me a ripe start of fear. PR has a nasty side to it! the second drop is a sheer stuka bomb down into a pinhole squeeze under the thunderbolt. while the first drop left me a little senseless, the second drop makes the first seem like gliding down a mosquito bite by comparison. it is a long harrowing fall and the butterflies in your stomach will flap their wings all the way to the bottom until you slam into the pull out. i tell you frankly folks, this pull-out was brutal and too much for hrry. some years ago i was hard up for cash so i volunteered for a medical study and the nurse, who looked a lot like nell carter, started removing tube after tube of blood from my arm. i felt kind of swimmy and nell said, "are you ok?" as i began a slow arc towards the floor. after she got me upright and seated she said with a chuckle, "i dont think this study is for you. not to sound racist or anything, but usually skinny white boys like you pass out every time after a few tubes of blood." well, ive found that in my old age, serious positive G moments on coasters make me a little woozy too. the moral of the story: this skinny white boy needs blood in his brain, and brain draining G forces on coasters counter that need. now if any of you manly skinny white boys out there feel the need to chime in that youve never gone dark after giving blood or on phantoms revenge i will throw a fit and i will personally write the code for a virus that will enter your computer and replace all of your choice porn with mpegs of outtakes from "barney the dinosaur" and also destroy all of your "no limits" coaster models you spent hours working on. so dont do it! refrain please! but now back to phantoms revenge. after the wet-tuxedo feeling G-forces preceding the second drop you spin around and up into a very shocking section which is quite unforgettable. the fabled "bunny hops" on PR are indeed ALL THAT and they are the most f***ed up round of spasmodic ejection air you will get on any coaster. its not like wood coaster air. its different. it reminds me of an abrupt and disturbing row of hiccups. you know how sometimes you get hiccups, and they are so unpredictable, rough and rib-cage rattling that they seem a little painful, but funny at the same time? well thats how the ending of the phantoms revenge is. it is more a ride that will astonish you rather than exhilarate you. most of the folks coming into the station have the same "whoa nelly" look on their faces, a look saying "that was fun, but if it was a second longer id be leaving this thing in a straight jacket." ill ride it again next time i go to kennywood, but probably only once. i cant take too much of that madness, but it is an exquisite madness.

Review Comments

fergusonat on 8/12/2005 12:02:12 AM said:
It truly is madness...I think you hit the ride dead on, man. I didnt think the pull-out was all that intense, but it certainly isnt a ride for the faint of heart. Insane airtime, too
hrrytraver on 8/12/2005 8:57:54 AM said:
EDIT COMMENT. for anyone who comes across this review- i thought you might like to know that in my original version everywhere you see the phrase "phantoms revenge" it originally said "phantoms menace." my subsequent proofreads didnt reveal this. only this morning did i notice. i confess that this summer ive re-watched the original three movies and ive seen episode 3 twice in the theatres. i am what is known by most as a "dork."
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